A Shade of Me


Summer SHRIEK is the newest rage!  At least it is in my house.  

I started this particular summer day with my two girls, ages ten and seven, like many others.   A SHRIEK OF BLOODY TERROR, SCREAMING from the back of the house, a good old fashioned cuss word from Mom (moi), a drop of a mid rinse toothbrush and an explosion out of my bedroom like I’m an early morning swat team about to raid!

I run like a fierce mama bear down the hallway, half naked with toothpaste spit still all over my mouth, dodging shoes, toys, clothes and a pizza roll (wait! A pizza roll?  What’s a pizza roll doing on the floor)?  Convinced I’m going to find broken bones, a blood bath or a home made guillotine, I round the corner only to find my oldest, huffing, puffing and stomping off dramatically. While left in her settling dust, is my little in tears.

Two sisters… fighting… getting ready for BIBLE CAMP mind you!

Relieved no one was physically hurt, I wiped the tears and toothpaste spit away and asked what was the matter?  Seems my little was picking out a PINK headband to go with her PINK shirt she was wearing.  When my oldest observed this clearly life altering decision her sister was about to make, she felt obligated to voice, your shirt is ORANGE, why don’t you pick out an ORANGE headband?  


I saw in each of their tiny, red, flushed and flustered faces as I attempted to console, that they were clearly both very hurt and frustrated more than anything, at the lack of understanding.  The fact that the other was truly not SEEING what they were so plainly seeing themselves.  PINK and ORANGE.

I tried to calmly articulate to each of them, that neither of them were exactly wrong.  That we were all created uniquely and individually in the image of God.  That when one is experiencing something, it’s being filtered through the lens of her heart, her set of eyes, all of her thoughts and emotions.  It’s not wrong, it’s just her unique expression of experience.   It’s how she is honestly perceiving it.  And vice versa.

This shined LIGHT for me.  Which I might say, is not always easy to receive when you’re sittin’ pretty in the dark.

Like my daughters, I too, have been deeply hurt by others incapacity to comprehend.  I have been frustrated to the point of sickness, sleepless nights and tears.  I’ve felt I have been completely misunderstood, wrongly judged and just not seen or heard accurately.

I’m sure you too have felt this at times.  We all have.  We all at one time or another in life, have and will experience the draining defeat and heartache of division in vision.  We’ve experienced it in our hearts, our homes, our communities, our country and our world.

It’s painfully real.

But may we step back for a moment.  Breathe deeply and create space for Grace and insight.  Seeing, that maybe, just maybe in between all the tears, sharp, hurtful, wounding words, snubs, jabs and snares, that just possibly, It’s not about right or wrong necessarily, but authentic perception.

And isn’t it true that this same remarkable authenticity births not only division in our world but also the beauty and culture we so enjoy?  Personal perspective permits us to look at a painting or listen to a lyric and be inspired or changed or blessed by a fresh set of eyes, a different point view, a refreshing revelation.

In order for us to gather all the good that comes from our individuality, I guess, we must too make room for the hard stuff.  The butting of heads.  The huffing and puffing and stomping off.  The tears.

Maybe, we realize that at times, there may be a shade of you and a shade of me that we are just unable to see.  And that’s alright.  

Let the lens of LOVE and TRUTH  however,  always be our answer and always be our finality, when I happen to see PINK and you happen to see ORANGE.

 Love is patient, love is kind.  It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.  It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.  Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.  It always protects, always trust, always hopes, always perseveres. (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

Frankly, I thought the shirt was a peachy – pink myself.   Just saying.  

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2 thoughts on “A Shade of Me

  1. Judging others and being judged is the most painful and destructive thing we do as humans. Some are criticized for being judgemental, which in itself is a judgement.

    Since I may see pink and they may see orange, it’s always somewhere in the middle as your story suggests.

    I pray going forward that I will take my ego out of the way and make even more room for grace, forgiveness, and love. I like remembering the phrase that EGO, stands for edging God ( love) out!!!!!!

    And next time when a disagreement comes up I’ll think of these to colors pink and orange and I will relax!!!!!! After all pink and orange are the colors of the sunset, a relaxing time indeed!!!!!!!😉. Thanks for this Jennifer.

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