The One Word that Could Improve Your Marriage Instantly

Thrilled to be sitting in the third row, seeing my favorite LAUGH OUT LOUD, SO FREAKING HARD comedian Rodman, he threw out a question to the audience.

“What is the one word you would describe that has kept your marriage together?”

Honestly, I’m having a hard time recalling what everyone said.  I do remember some guy blurting out SEX, of course and another YES, as in Yes Dear.  I think one woman said laughter and another friendship And I agree with all of them.

For our marriage, I’d say the one word that has made us work for the just about nineteen years we’ve been married is RESPECT.

I had picked  up an extra yoga class to instruct, so that meant having to leave before the kids got up and ready for school.  By the time I would get home, we would need to race out the door in order for them to get to school on time.

This would leave my Husband with the responsibilities of getting them up, dressed, feeding them breakfast, packing lunches, snacks, water bottles, picking out and ironing clothes, hair, teeth, ect.  Having everything packed and ready to go!

My initial thought was “Hey, I’m working, he’s perfectly capable of doing what I do everyday.”


There would be weeping there, gnashing and grinding of teeth.”  

You get my drift.

It would leave my Husband and Daughters to start out their day stressed, flustered, crying and probably not speaking to one another, all while he’s trying to get ready and out the door for work.

So I decided to prepack their lunches, snacks and water bottles the night before.  I made sure they had clean clothes in their drawers, so things would run smoothly.  All he had to do was wake them up and scoop out the already made oatmeal for breakfast and the rest was taken care of.

I came home after teaching Holy Yoga to a happy, peaceful family.  Girls were dressed and smiling, all I had to do was swoop up two pony tails and get them in the car.  Hubby was cologned up, ready to give me a kiss goodbye and walk out the door to have a great day!  And I felt good.  I did right by my family.  RESPECT.

And he does the same for me in so many crazy, beautiful, sexy, selfless ways.  We see each other, we hear each other, we think of each other.  Time and time again.  We show up.  We get up.  We give the best of ourselves in little and in big ways.

This morning I woke up early, I didn’t have to.  It’s summer, I could have slept in.  But My Husband has an extra long work day today.  So I snuck out of before he did, to do the work his morning normally consists of.  I made him an iced coffee, a gourmet breakfast and packed his lunch so he could have a few more quite moments to himself.

He appreciated it.  I got a loving text on his way to work thanking me.  And I thanked him back for all that he does for our family.

This doesn’t always happen.  Last night he came home and in my defense, I did make a delicious chicken salad that was in the fridge and ready to go for dinner.  And,  I did think for a second to get off of the couch and serve it to him.  I even thought I’d make him a quesadilla on the side.  But…..  I was too tired and burnt out myself after a long day with the kids.

Okay, so maybe it’s all about providing each other the gifts of  respect  along with mercy.

 When our spouses see and feel us giving our all to the relationship, it is easier for them to notice and respect  (There’s that word again!) the times we are human and just need a break, and vice versa.

What about you?  What is the one word you would say that describes your relationship’s success?  Maybe there is one word that describes it’s fall?  In that case, I hope this helps shine light and encouragement for future relationships.

How will you love really well today?  I’d love to here!

She considers a [new] field before she buys it or accepts it [expanding prudently and not courting neglect of her present duties by assuming other duties];  with her savings  [of time and strength] she plants fruitful vines in her vineyard. Proverbs 31:16 AMP

Husbands, love your wives, [seek the highest good for her and surround her with a caring, unselfish love], just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her.  Ephesians 5:25 AMP


(Mark and I with Rodman after the show!)

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One thought on “The One Word that Could Improve Your Marriage Instantly

  1. Yes, and that is alot of work and thought and sacrifice……It shows your spouse you care. And yes that makes them care right back at ya!!!! Respect and Mercy!!! It’s tried and true!! Thanks Jennifer.

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